No, you cannot only provide terrible options

I'm not above Hair Cuttery.  The stylists are licensed professionals who had to practice on the same types of locks as a high-end salon owner in order to get near my head.  Some places, though, cannot rest on these laurels as it is questionable where said licenses were earned or who is providing the overall creative direction.  Take for instance a barber shop I passed recently which boasted a few of their top sellers on a sign out on the sidewalk.  Let's take a minute to analyze each option, shall we?  The two on the top, though awful, are at least dismissible as a momentary lapse in judgment.  The bottom two are just beyond; the captions should read "If you want to look like a rapist, early 90's C-list white rapper, or generally like to spend time alone, PICK ME!"  There is no way any sane person would look in the mirror after their mane was completely massacred into this shape and convince themselves that things are looking up.  At least I know which stylists to blame when I see a mess of this caliber roaming the city- here's looking at you Barber Shop on MacDougal and West 8th Street.